Robin, this is written beautifully and I love how you leave in your own personal story of you and your brother, your mother and your father. Deep and profound as well as providing wonderful tools thank you so much. This is the kind of work that I love and have a passion for, take care of yourself with love
Thank you, Prajna. This is perhaps the most personal story I have written here. I almost didn't post--it felt so exposed. That feeling of vulnerability is, in part, why I am working on telling my grandmother's story in a memoir, and not my own. The main reason I focus on her untold secret is that I aim to lift up her voice, a woman who silenced herself in life after a deep experience of trauma.
For me, this is a step towards walking the walk--an unfolding and enfolding experience of examining trauma in my own life. I appreciate your kind words.
I understand what you’re talking about, makes perfectly good sense and I think it’s a good approach. I think you noticed my typo was for weaving, not leaving.
Robin, this is written beautifully and I love how you weave in your own personal story of you and your brother, your mother and your father. Deep and profound as well as providing wonderful tools thank you so much. This is the kind of work that I love and have a passion for, take care of yourself, with love.
Beautiful post, Robin. I love the six keys you offer. Thank you for sharing how trauma showed up in your family, and some of the reasons why.
Healing generational trauma is one of the most important processes of our time. When I look at the conflicts in our world, and at the indivituals and groups perpetuating them, I see unhealed trauma in action. Who hasn't been touched by it?
This point in your personal essay stands out for me: "Meanwhile, younger generations are tackling these stories head-on. TikTok is full of #generationaltrauma posts. For Gen Z and Millennials, speaking openly about mental health isn’t taboo—it’s a necessary step toward healing." Wow! I'm not on TikTok, and had no idea about the hashtag. However, I have had a clear sense that the younger generations embrace the topic of mental health and healing in a way that many Boomers and Gen Xers didn't (at least, during our younger years). Seeing greater empathy and sensitivity emerging in youth and young adults gives me hope. It's an example of generational evolution. To me, it also affirms that the days of extremist authoritarian regimes are numbered. About to be shed like old skin.
Cultivating compassion and empathy are vital not only to our evolution, but our survival. Speaking honestly and openly. Being willing to listen, explore, and hold space for complex situations and discussions. Understanding that our histories, both political and personal, matter. In every sense of that word.
I wish you well in the powerful work you are doing to release memories and help future generations thrive.
I similarly was affected by generational trauma on both sides. But it wasn't until a few years that I understood. I grew up with my grandparents after my mother's death, and my grandmother was deeply affected by the 1910 Mexican Revolution. Her parents were revolutionaries, she was taken away from her beloved grandparents and grew up in a Methodist boarding school. For her, education and merciless strict control was the way to get ahead during the depression.
Wow, Zara. This is so resonant. War and revolution and death and religion--all of these can be so deeply affecting.
In psychology there has been profound research into childhood trauma into Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES). They've designed a test to measure the depth of trauma children have suffered--abuse, neglect, household dysfunction--and how that translates in their lives. The more of these experiences a child has suffered, the greater the adverse effects. It sounds like in your family, there were compound impacts that have reverberated down generations.
Thank you for sharing. Definitely necessary work, lead by the compassionate lens of our soul to reach our human understanding, including how we carry it in our body, as you point out. 😊🙏💜
Thank you, Simone. Appreciate your highlighting this important element--how we carry trauma in our bodies. I think it's something we often gloss over, or don't connect to the wounds of the past.
Curious, if you're willing to share: how does this show up for you?
Hi Robin, Like you, l am a story teller so l can only speak from my experience and observation of family and friends. Most notably, it shows in my pain body … a vulnerability that is already there might flare. For example, when l was caring for my partner at home (MND), his speech was one of the first functions he lost as MND had manifested in his throat. I was caring for him at home so was on constant alert and subsequent adrenaline. A few months before he died, a blood test showed my thyroid had lost all function. A scan a couple of years ago indicated that my C1-7 discs are all bulging. While l had the usual bumps and crashes, it was a bit of a surprise. I can make connections through the physical and spiritual…. Throat chakra, blocked energy etc. My sister has a complication of digestive issues that she can locate to her estranged relationship with our mother. The intergenerational and ancestral healing is so important. And we carry wounds into other lives as we cycle with our team. We can continue our healing work with passed ancestors, not to change the event, but the energy surrounding events we might have experienced in this life, but also those patterns that we have not remembered, yet carry in our bodies. Fascinating 😊🙏❤️😇
Thank you for sharing your experience here. So illuminating, Simone.
I am struck by your conclusion: "We can continue our healing work with passed ancestors, not to change the event, but the energy surrounding events we might have experienced in this life, but also those patterns that we have not remembered, yet carry in our bodies."
The patterns we have not remembered--it strikes me that there is really no difference between memory as a brain activity, as a physical activity, as a mental and emotional activity and as a spiritual activity. They are all intertwined.
Sometimes we get messages from one place, like the body, which is a message from our hearts to our brains to stop and take stock.
Learning to notice the signals (which we try to suppress for many reasons), pay attention, and make gentle inquiry into what's going on and how better to take care of ourselves, is so important. Unless we care for (and about) ourselves, we cannot really take care of anyone else.
Maybe this forms part of a seventh key--what do you think?
Hi Robin, Thank you. I agree that the memories are all intertwined — the emotion I understand is connected to the human physical experience of contrast, that the spiritual aspect of the memory is the guidance from our soul in the choices that we make — this is coming from the perspective that our soul is having multiple experiences and that the life we are currently having, as we see it, is just one of those experiences. This may relate to why our body may alert us to memories that have not quite materialised in our minds, how we repeat intergenerational patterns before we are aware of them etc. Of course, the current context of the experience shapes our choices. Your point about noticing really resonates, and I understand self care to be a type of surrender and acceptance — why is it that we find it difficult to afford ourselves the compassion and grace we give to others? A cultural conditioning? Compassion changes the energy around the trauma. Yes, perhaps this is part of the seventh key — when our energy shifts around an event, it impacts on those who were involved. This is how we break patterns that no longer serve the soul group. 🙏
Hi Robin, Number 1, great question ... many in one universe is the feeling - sense I get as I sit quietly with this. My (limited) understanding is that our soul is far more expansive than our body, so one aspect of our soul's energetic signature is in and around (aura) our body, and we have simultaneous existences — we are 'everywhere, all at once' ... quoting that because my mother has just dropped that in (which has its context for when she was here). Question 2: definitely ... the ancestors are in our team, so when we shift the energy, it resonates to them ... the more I shift, the more the portals open and I receive messages. Q3: definitely, this links to Q2. I can see also, the change in my sister as she is working to heal her mother-childhood wound, and my mother is also around her often. It is intentional work, so our relationships don't end when one person dies. Like how my relationship with John is now soul to soul. Q3: Yes, when we heal the energy, then the pattern stops. Eg, my sister thought she broke the mother - daughter estrangement (which my mother had with her mother), by parenting her daughters differently, however that doesn't break the pattern while my sister harbours resentment. In the act of bringing compassion to herself, she brings to to her mother, thus helping mum heal too — she is assisting of course, and this healing energy reverberates amongst the whole group. hopefully then , future generations are not longer born with this trauma pattern in their bodies because it has been energetically resolved. I am no expert Robin, this is just how I understand what I receive. Totally agree, I don't think our human design is to understand everything on a cognitive level, that is why we begin to remember at a conscious, soul level — communicated through our heart 💜 🙏
I will add that doing this has been a lifelong process.
Definitely. The greater awareness, the more the need to investigate, the greater the potential for healing. It is not a one-and-done kind of thing.
It's very important to acknowledge this before the healing works could start
Agree. Intention and attention can and should go hand-in-hand
Lovely post, Robin. I’m with you in this worthy heart and soul work!
Thank you, Ceci ❤️🩹
Robin, this is written beautifully and I love how you leave in your own personal story of you and your brother, your mother and your father. Deep and profound as well as providing wonderful tools thank you so much. This is the kind of work that I love and have a passion for, take care of yourself with love
Thank you, Prajna. This is perhaps the most personal story I have written here. I almost didn't post--it felt so exposed. That feeling of vulnerability is, in part, why I am working on telling my grandmother's story in a memoir, and not my own. The main reason I focus on her untold secret is that I aim to lift up her voice, a woman who silenced herself in life after a deep experience of trauma.
For me, this is a step towards walking the walk--an unfolding and enfolding experience of examining trauma in my own life. I appreciate your kind words.
I understand what you’re talking about, makes perfectly good sense and I think it’s a good approach. I think you noticed my typo was for weaving, not leaving.
🌹
Robin, this is written beautifully and I love how you weave in your own personal story of you and your brother, your mother and your father. Deep and profound as well as providing wonderful tools thank you so much. This is the kind of work that I love and have a passion for, take care of yourself, with love.
No worries, Prajna. All about the "weaving"!
Beautiful post, Robin. I love the six keys you offer. Thank you for sharing how trauma showed up in your family, and some of the reasons why.
Healing generational trauma is one of the most important processes of our time. When I look at the conflicts in our world, and at the indivituals and groups perpetuating them, I see unhealed trauma in action. Who hasn't been touched by it?
This point in your personal essay stands out for me: "Meanwhile, younger generations are tackling these stories head-on. TikTok is full of #generationaltrauma posts. For Gen Z and Millennials, speaking openly about mental health isn’t taboo—it’s a necessary step toward healing." Wow! I'm not on TikTok, and had no idea about the hashtag. However, I have had a clear sense that the younger generations embrace the topic of mental health and healing in a way that many Boomers and Gen Xers didn't (at least, during our younger years). Seeing greater empathy and sensitivity emerging in youth and young adults gives me hope. It's an example of generational evolution. To me, it also affirms that the days of extremist authoritarian regimes are numbered. About to be shed like old skin.
Cultivating compassion and empathy are vital not only to our evolution, but our survival. Speaking honestly and openly. Being willing to listen, explore, and hold space for complex situations and discussions. Understanding that our histories, both political and personal, matter. In every sense of that word.
I wish you well in the powerful work you are doing to release memories and help future generations thrive.
I similarly was affected by generational trauma on both sides. But it wasn't until a few years that I understood. I grew up with my grandparents after my mother's death, and my grandmother was deeply affected by the 1910 Mexican Revolution. Her parents were revolutionaries, she was taken away from her beloved grandparents and grew up in a Methodist boarding school. For her, education and merciless strict control was the way to get ahead during the depression.
Wow, Zara. This is so resonant. War and revolution and death and religion--all of these can be so deeply affecting.
In psychology there has been profound research into childhood trauma into Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES). They've designed a test to measure the depth of trauma children have suffered--abuse, neglect, household dysfunction--and how that translates in their lives. The more of these experiences a child has suffered, the greater the adverse effects. It sounds like in your family, there were compound impacts that have reverberated down generations.
The good news is, there are ways to start to begin mitigating the impacts. If you're curious, I'd recommend this as a good place to start with accessible information: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/03/02/387007941/take-the-ace-quiz-and-learn-what-it-does-and-doesnt-mean
We must take care of ourselves!
Thanks. Saved it for later. I'll get back with you on this.
Thank you for sharing. Definitely necessary work, lead by the compassionate lens of our soul to reach our human understanding, including how we carry it in our body, as you point out. 😊🙏💜
Thank you, Simone. Appreciate your highlighting this important element--how we carry trauma in our bodies. I think it's something we often gloss over, or don't connect to the wounds of the past.
Curious, if you're willing to share: how does this show up for you?
Hi Robin, Like you, l am a story teller so l can only speak from my experience and observation of family and friends. Most notably, it shows in my pain body … a vulnerability that is already there might flare. For example, when l was caring for my partner at home (MND), his speech was one of the first functions he lost as MND had manifested in his throat. I was caring for him at home so was on constant alert and subsequent adrenaline. A few months before he died, a blood test showed my thyroid had lost all function. A scan a couple of years ago indicated that my C1-7 discs are all bulging. While l had the usual bumps and crashes, it was a bit of a surprise. I can make connections through the physical and spiritual…. Throat chakra, blocked energy etc. My sister has a complication of digestive issues that she can locate to her estranged relationship with our mother. The intergenerational and ancestral healing is so important. And we carry wounds into other lives as we cycle with our team. We can continue our healing work with passed ancestors, not to change the event, but the energy surrounding events we might have experienced in this life, but also those patterns that we have not remembered, yet carry in our bodies. Fascinating 😊🙏❤️😇
Thank you for sharing your experience here. So illuminating, Simone.
I am struck by your conclusion: "We can continue our healing work with passed ancestors, not to change the event, but the energy surrounding events we might have experienced in this life, but also those patterns that we have not remembered, yet carry in our bodies."
The patterns we have not remembered--it strikes me that there is really no difference between memory as a brain activity, as a physical activity, as a mental and emotional activity and as a spiritual activity. They are all intertwined.
Sometimes we get messages from one place, like the body, which is a message from our hearts to our brains to stop and take stock.
Learning to notice the signals (which we try to suppress for many reasons), pay attention, and make gentle inquiry into what's going on and how better to take care of ourselves, is so important. Unless we care for (and about) ourselves, we cannot really take care of anyone else.
Maybe this forms part of a seventh key--what do you think?
Hi Robin, Thank you. I agree that the memories are all intertwined — the emotion I understand is connected to the human physical experience of contrast, that the spiritual aspect of the memory is the guidance from our soul in the choices that we make — this is coming from the perspective that our soul is having multiple experiences and that the life we are currently having, as we see it, is just one of those experiences. This may relate to why our body may alert us to memories that have not quite materialised in our minds, how we repeat intergenerational patterns before we are aware of them etc. Of course, the current context of the experience shapes our choices. Your point about noticing really resonates, and I understand self care to be a type of surrender and acceptance — why is it that we find it difficult to afford ourselves the compassion and grace we give to others? A cultural conditioning? Compassion changes the energy around the trauma. Yes, perhaps this is part of the seventh key — when our energy shifts around an event, it impacts on those who were involved. This is how we break patterns that no longer serve the soul group. 🙏
Fascinating, Simone. I so appreciate your insights.
So much in here to reflect on. I have questions:
1. "...our soul is having multiple experiences and. . . this is just one. . ." This from the perspective of the multiverse? Or many in one universe?
2. "Compassion changes the energy around the trauma." Might this transformation reach back to previous generations?
3. Breaking patterns no longer serving the soul group. Are you referring to past lives as well?
So much we don't understand at the cognitive level. But our hearts know. And souls.
Hi Robin, Number 1, great question ... many in one universe is the feeling - sense I get as I sit quietly with this. My (limited) understanding is that our soul is far more expansive than our body, so one aspect of our soul's energetic signature is in and around (aura) our body, and we have simultaneous existences — we are 'everywhere, all at once' ... quoting that because my mother has just dropped that in (which has its context for when she was here). Question 2: definitely ... the ancestors are in our team, so when we shift the energy, it resonates to them ... the more I shift, the more the portals open and I receive messages. Q3: definitely, this links to Q2. I can see also, the change in my sister as she is working to heal her mother-childhood wound, and my mother is also around her often. It is intentional work, so our relationships don't end when one person dies. Like how my relationship with John is now soul to soul. Q3: Yes, when we heal the energy, then the pattern stops. Eg, my sister thought she broke the mother - daughter estrangement (which my mother had with her mother), by parenting her daughters differently, however that doesn't break the pattern while my sister harbours resentment. In the act of bringing compassion to herself, she brings to to her mother, thus helping mum heal too — she is assisting of course, and this healing energy reverberates amongst the whole group. hopefully then , future generations are not longer born with this trauma pattern in their bodies because it has been energetically resolved. I am no expert Robin, this is just how I understand what I receive. Totally agree, I don't think our human design is to understand everything on a cognitive level, that is why we begin to remember at a conscious, soul level — communicated through our heart 💜 🙏
Wonderful article.
I’m embarking on this journey.
Love it, Sally! Can’t wait to talk it over with you
This was beautifully and powerfully written.